Is it true that when you stop trying to fix things, like a relation, you actually find happiness and freedom? I was trying to sleep and this line kept running in my head, I just couldn’t stop thinking about it at all. I am a big follower of Grey’s Anatomy and have been following the season 11 online.
The other day I watched the episode 5 where Callie and Arizona break up. The episode starts with them visiting a couple counselor to make their relationship work, and are asked to stay separate from each other inspite of staying in the same house. Separate rooms under one roof for 30 days without even talking to each other. Initially Callie is against it and is forced into accepting the decision in order to save her marriage. She breaks down the first day itself and talks to Arizona, who is strong headed and doesn’t utter a word. Somehow they manage to finish their 30 days and in the end Callie, who opposed this throughout, who always kept trying to save her marriage, who always kept fixing things, is the one calls it quits. Yes, somehow Callie realized in these 30 days that all this while she was suffocated in the marriage and was no longer herself. She wanted a break permanently in their marriage and no longer wanted to spend all of her time trying to fix something that she believed was broken already for far too long. She wanted to be happy again and didn’t envision that happening with Arizona. This episode ended with a line, “But no matter how hard we try, we have to realize, somethings can never be fixed”.
Once I finished seeing this episode, I had a smile on my face, especially after hearing the last line. A smile because I could see me and my ex in these two characters. I was the one who kept trying to fix our relationship all the time, which seemed like he didn’t want to. The day we broke up, I obviously stopped trying to fix something, all I had to do was think about myself, my happiness, my likes and my dislikes, and not what he wanted. For the first time I feel free, and trust me the taste of freedom is amazing. I have been in a relationship for like 15 years of my life, yes. First with my late fiancé and then it was my ex. All these years I never had the time to think about myself. And today, it’s all about me.
I could very well relate to a fictional character of Callie. Even that day after watching the episode, I slept with this thought, that I am free.
Being in a relationship is amazing, it’s a totally different experience, but when you are with the right person, situations always change, everyone has to go through some rough days and some happy days. During happy days, everything is great, even the relationship with your partner is great, but it is during the rough days the relationship is tested. Even I had great days with my ex, but when the tough days were bigger than our relationship. We couldn’t sustain, we tried making the relationship work twice but we failed. There’s no doubt my ex was a great guy once, but circumstances have changed him a lot now. It has changed me as well.
What I realized after the episode is happiness is important, there’s nothing wrong in thinking about my happiness. When I am happy I can keep others happy. Happiness for others and ourselves is equally important.
Have an amazing week everyone !!